Don’t Hire a Matchmaker (until you’ve made it through Julie Ferman’s Boot Camp)

1300 couples I’ve seen partner up over the course of 33 years in the matchmaker’s chair. It’s been a fascinating, wild ride and it’s taken me that long to perfect the craft.

Why does Personal Matchmaking work beautifully for some clients, and … not so well for others? It’s taken me over three decades to discover the answer to that question, which is crystal clear to me now.

WHO are the people I see waltzing off into the sunset, in partnership with a new love? There’s one consistently common denominator. They’re GROWERS. They’re smart enough to know that they don’t know everything.

Who are my Success Story Couples — The single men, the single women who’ve SUCCEEDED with my personal matchmaking process?  These 2600 people share some key common denominators.

They’re curious – about love, about communication and human connection. They’re courageous – enough to seek out, to shine light on their blind spots.

They’re willing – even eager to explore new avenues, to challenge themselves to stretch and grow beyond their comfort zone.

They’re committed to growth, expansion, discovery – to becoming the better (and better and better) version of themselves – expanding in capacity for self-love, understanding, compassion, acceptance, and generosity of spirit. The men and women I see succeeding as matchmaking clients – it’s simple. They’re growers…. They practice Love. They study Love, they have claimed responsibility for the love that they experience (or don’t experience) in life. They’re willing to be, they’re eager to be at CAUSE, in the driver’s seat of their life’s love story. They’re creators – bringing about the change that’s needed to attract, inspire and maintain a loving partnership.

Which personal matchmaking clients tend to fail? – even with the skills, talents, expertise, and the huge database of candidates that the matchmaker provides? That answer is simple too. The matchmaking clients who tend to fail, who don’t make a connection with any of the candidates they have the chance to meet? It’s the folks looking for the quick fix, the people with a scarcity mindset, playing the victim role, blaming circumstances and other people for the discomfort they feel. “Julie, I’m so tired of dating – here’s some money, just FIX it for me. Find love for me. Find the perfect partner for me.”

Yep, those Quick Fix / Victim folks?  

I don’t work with them anymore.

Only Growers Need Apply.

We’ve got a real chance at success with Growers.

I’ll go to the ends of the earth to serve my matchmaking clients – and I choose them carefully, more so now than ever before. Only growers get to sit in my Client Hot Seat. Everyone else, I’ll send back to online dating with a strong suggestion that they stop bitching about it.

Doing dating well requires a two-pronged approach:

The Inner Work, done best with a coach, in a loving, supportive group format.

The Strategic Action Plan, developed thoughtfully with a coach

Disciplined Consistency in Working The Plan, perpetually learning, growing and welcoming the insights that come with the complexities of love and relationship that are inherent in our modern-day culture.

Growers, Welcome Here

The formula for success here in my personal matchmaking community.

Register privately, so I can find you when I’m searching for my Matchmaking Clients and for my Coaching Clients.

Personal Consultation, scheduled with Julie, via Zoom: One hour of your time, two hours of Julie’s time ($295): Link here:

Boot Camp, by invitation $2995 (your $295 Consultation fee applies toward Boot Camp) Purchase Boot Camp Enrollment:


Podcast Episode, describing Julie’s 60-Day Virtual Boot Camp:

Testimonials from Boot Camp Graduates:

“I am getting so much out of this Boot Camp. You have structured it in a very clever, user-friendly way, and I must say, Julie — you’re SUCH an excellent educator!”

“I LOVE the Thursday Evening and Friday morning live group Office Hours Zoom gatherings, and I’m blown away by the amount of personal time you’re sharing with me, in our private consultations and your weekly emails – always personal, thoughtful, insightful and so supportive. I’m actually excited about dating for the first time in years.”

“The guest interviews you’re sharing with us — they really have me diving deep. I see myself having realizations that were hidden in plain sight. Women are less of a mystery – the open-hearted sharing during our group calls has been such a gift.”

“The questions you are asking are SO relevant to this thing we call “modern dating”.   The questions you ask in the weekly assignment worksheets – they are quite profound. Many “Aha” moments for me, as I see patterns in speech and behavior that are begging for the light of day! So much is becoming clear.”

“You are channeling very inspiring love energy! Thank you for creating this class; I imagine that if I’d had the chance to take this class in school, I would have made MUCH better choices. This personal and group experience has expanded my awareness, confidence, and empathy in dating and in life.”

“I want to thank you for this amazing program. I have listened to all of the weekly lessons and the guest interviews and I’ve thoughtfully completed all of the worksheets you’ve shared. I want to express my appreciation.  Everything about this course material is helpful and very impressive.  I have done so much self-development and psych training over the years, and I think what you have put together is truly remarkable!”

“I am just loving this bootcamp.  You are so holistically knowledgeable and inspiring for me.”


“With Boot Camp I am starting to become a fully self-actualized, has-his-shit-together Dude! My eyes are wide open and I see possibilities and opportunities that I’ve never seen before.”


“Boot Camp is akin to the Best of Julie Ferman. Three reasons it worked for me: 1) Boot Camp helped to frame where I am and who I am, very different than six months ago; 2) Boot Camp helped me to fine tune who I am looking for and filter out unrealistic expectations; 3) The weekly “office” hours Zoom Calls – a great example of iron sharpening iron and created a nice bond with the other classmates. I have made good friends here, and we’ll be staying in touch. I’m pairing up with a fellow classmate to co-create our first event together.  Awesome. “


“A greater ability to be true to myself, to have patience and the willingness to be in suspense, as to who my “future partner” will be, learning not rush or push things to get past singleness. Fully engaging in the whole process of doing dating well, vs. looking to get to the end result – Brilliantly simple and a much more satisfying, meaningful way to approach and manage the dating process. The skills we’re building in this class (communication especially) will serve us well in the relationships that are in our future.”


“I feel like now I have permission to “date” and kick the tires, try on hats, knowing (not guessing at) what the ground rules are and strategies for success in dating / relationship in today’s rapidly evolving culture.  As a result of the course, I am in a better position to date because of a better grasp of who I am and what I am (and am not) looking for, what’s a must-have requirement and what’s a mere preference. I’m no longer ‘alone’ in the dating process. I have a team and a gifted, talented, diligently hard-working Coach / Guide. Thank you.”


Are YOU a grower? If so, you are “my people” — We will be very happy to know each other.  Welcome.


With Love,

 Julie Ferman, Cupid’s Coach




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